Written: Sunday, 24. July 2005

My text

The reason I write my notes on this site is as I have said before, I am dyslexic, and I find it easier to get my thoughts down in text.

You will probably find that my sentences are a bit odd to read or contain spelling mistakes.

I try to spell check but sometimes I miss words or select the wrong word to replace the incorrect word.

The structure of my sentences may give you an idea how my thoughts are produced.

Often the problem with having dyslexia is that people do not understand that you see the world differently. People will compare themselves (being so called normal) to those with dyslexia. Dyslexia if often referred to the hidden disability. Indeed dyslexia is a disability. The difference being that visually you seem the same as all the other normals, and so you get the same expectations as normal people have.

One of the most significant aspects of dyslexia is extremely poor memory. An example being something as simple as being asked to buy three items. For me, unless I write it down I will be lucky to remember 1 item.

A another example is being told directions. For me I will only remember the last part.

So you can understand when I was in school how people thought I was simply stupid when I was unable to remember things and would always score badly in tests.

By the way I have a degree so I am not that thick.

I was not diagnosed for dyslexia until I went to college, until then I was just considered thick and would be placed in the classes for the thick kids. In fact sometimes I was separated on my own do just do silly puzzles.

This is the dilemma. At school I was bright, yet could not do the work. Its an odd feeling. I suppose the best example like being told by everybody that your blind even though you can see perfectly. After a while you will believe them and become convinced your blind. So I soon was convinced I was thick. In fact I found some lessons pointless.

But I did find I could learn facts. No, I do not mean facts such as dates of battles or the names of parts of plants, these I soon forgot. But the facts I learnt were how and why things became or worked. For me I could visualize this and would spend time thinking about it. I learnt to think.

But this is jumping forward a bit. I think its important to see how I thought at an early age.

Dyslexia was not a problem to me until a few years into primary school. It was math's that I first found problems. I was given a handful of coins and asked to add them up. I found this impossible as I could not understand why the 2p was worth less than the 10p. You see the 2p was a larger coin than the 10p so it made sense to me the 2p should be worth more. As such I could not for years understand the relation to the coin size to the value of the coins. Even today I find it hard to handle coins. Its one reason I use a switch card. Sometimes I will just stare at coins as even now they look meaningless.

Now this led to an interesting event. You see the teacher in my class would allow you to go play once you finish your work. And as I had no understanding of most of the lessons I would just scribble any old junk down, hand it to her, get lots of red marks and was allowed to go play. Now while all the other kids would be working hard, I would be playing in the changing room with this girl. The thing was she would strip off. Thus begun my realization that I did have one talent in life and that was the ability to get women to take there cloths of for me.

A few years later I went to middle school. Again I had not much interest in schoolwork, but I still had fun at school.

At this point my dad had got married and I moved in with him and his new wife (who was fit). Until then I had been living with my Nan.

As both my dad and step mom worked, I would stay after school with a family near my middle school. Now at this house they had a daughter (I think she was older than me), she used to also strip off. For some reason I must have an affect on women.

But the best thing was my step mom. She would take me to the swimming baths. I used to tell her I was too scared to go change in the men's changing room, so she would take me into the woman's. Wow. I would just spend my time looking around. It was open planed and when we went it was full of 20 year olds. I was in a room full of sexy naked wet 20 year old women. I loved every second. The best bit was when we were in the showers. I would be stood inches away from sexy wet woman covered in soap. Yes these were the best days of my life.

In high school, I found that the girls were a bit more prudish. No matter these were the days of vhs. This was before -bleep- films (R18) became legal. I used to rent out pirated vhs -bleep-, using my mates video to record them on. Great days.

Around this time I got a BBC B computer. It changed my life. You see I could now type stuff and the computer spell checked it. This was fantastic.

As time went on I got a PC and eventually got on the internet. Now I get woman to strip for me all the time. Nothing beats having some fit 20 year old strip off for you.

So how did I get a degree.

Well at school I managed to get a few GCSE's over at a C level or better. My first main job was working in a soil testing place. Man did it suck. I used to phone in sick all the time. It was so dull.

Anyway one day some of us w re chatting, and we said this job sucks, lets go to college. I agreed (not meaning it). I must have applied to a college (I still do not remember doing it)., and got an interview.

At the interview there was a fit babe. Man was she hot. So I thought college equals hot babe

. So I told the chap a lot of guff about wanting to get in (all I was thinking was babes).

Well I got in. And it was not full of babes. Anyway, had fun for two years. I did ok as it was all assignments, so no exams. I passed. Someone suggested to go to university, I said ok (not expecting to get in). So I applied.

And yes I got in. it was full of babes of all types, Goths, punks, Asian, and so on. It was great. Only problem is they expected you to study and work hard. Anyway I passed. So I ended up with a degree. I never meant to.

So that’s me. A randy little sod with dyslexia.

Written: Sunday, 24. July 2005

Caravans

Why do people have these ugly things?

I never understand why people love these pale white boxes. What pleaser do people get from buying something (which is normally quite expensive), and dragging it to some nasty little field (and having to pay to park it).

You see I can understand camping. Its cheap and portable. You can put the gear on your back and walk anywhere you wish.

But caravans are not cheap. You are limited to places you can go. Often you will have to pay to park it.

Not only that but there is nothing uglier than some caravan parked outside your house.

On the road they are a menace. Most are wider than the car tow them, and so if overtaking a cyclist, its very easy to clip them with the caravan.

If you want to go camping then use a tent.

Surly it must be easer and cheaper to book a room in a hotel? I mean caravans are not cheap to buy, then you have insurance, plus the cost to park it in a tatty field. Not to mention the extra cost of fuel of dragging extra weight.

And what pleaser do you get parking the thing in some farmers field next to often a bunch of unpleasant people.

Ok, I can understand if your retired and have sold up to travel the world. It would be nice to go to different countries with your own wee house.

But what pleaser do you get from a cold damp night in the middle of nowhere. Then getting up and having some nasty breakfast in nasty plastic bowls sat pretending to have a nice time. And then what do you do? Walk around a bit, get cold and wet. Then sit in your smelly little box till bed time.

I mean its just so cheap to get flights to most countries. You could be having such a nice time in a hot place, eating great food. Visiting exotic places.

But no, you choose a wet muddy field to spend your spare time.

So, no I do not understand these people. All I can think is they enjoy misery.

Written: Saturday, 23. July 2005

UK Politics 2005

We seem to be at a rather dull time in UK politics. The current prime minister Tony Blair, came to power with excitement and a whole lot of promises under the name of New Labour. What did we get. Well not quite a new Labour but a new Conservative party.

New Labour brought in fees for students, something if the old Conservative government had brought in would have meant huge demonstrations. Of course New Labour got around that by making it a criminal act to demonstrate.

So we now have students studying for often worthless degrees believing that afterwards they will be in well paid jobs and the 20k debt will be worth it. The truth is students now find it hard to get well paid jobs and end up doing jobs that do not require a degree.

I have been let down by New Labour, who just spin everything. I have no trust in them, especially when they seem to only interested in gains for themselves. An example being the deputy prime minister who in the real world would be lucky to have a basic manual job. Yet this chap has a castle for a home and other houses. Not bad going.

I also fear the way they are moving towards removing peoples rights. As yet I see no possible use for an ID card. It would not have stopped the recent London Tube attacks.

Unfortunately the reason this bunch of tripe is in power is that there is no alternative.

The current Conservative party has not had a solid leader since Major. On top of that they have decided to always stand on extremist issues. The current seems often asylum seekers, often directing there polices to the racist elements. Before this was the European union, wanting to wreck the country by pulling out. Unfortunately they have not noticed that each year the UK moves more positively towards Europe. In fact as people travel to European countries for holidays, they use the eu dolor. As such it becomes a second currency in the UK.

The Liberal Democrats though, being liked, come across as wishy washy. They have struggled to make much impact. They have not realized that they do not put forward there ideas in a strong way.

I suspect that by definition Liberal Democrats cannot stand up and be a powerful body as it would take a slightly more right wring attitude to do so. By this I mean most in the party are wishy washy people, and I suspect it would be against there beliefs to act differently, hence they will never become a second or even the main UK party, only the third.

Of course there are other parties.

I traditionally vote green. In truth because I support any green policies. But in the last few years something interesting has happed, suddenly they are acting as a party with strong polices. In deed we have seen intelligent strong candidates on TV discussing issues on politics shows and being taken seriously. I think its time for them to decide whether or not to become a serious player.

One of the dangers of having such a weak and not popular government and opposition, is that its very easy to find that the extremist moves in and fill the gap. Parties such as the British National party can easily play on peoples fears and hates. By giving bug promises they can gain votes.

The method of voting for parties rather than people is a method I do not support. I believe it would be better for people to vote for people (by this they would be standing on there own beliefs rather than on party policies or indeed on a party name). The government would then be made up of those who have been voted in.

At the moment, if Mrs. Xyz was voted in by everybody in her town, but she was an independent or stood for an opposite party to the one voted in, she would still only be on the opposition seats. Yet she could be the most popular person in the country. For me this just seems daft.

Written: Saturday, 23. July 2005

Call Centers

Over the last few years call centers have played a huge part in business all over the world.

Many UK firms operate them. The aim to save money, also often more efficient and affective than having lots of local shops.

For some firms call centers have created brand new businesses, such as mail order firms. Of course making orders by phone rather than mail.

The problem with call centers is that their aim is to make money. This means workers become machines rather than people. Often working exact hours, each minute logged and timed.

Every possible effort is done to drag out as much from workers as they can. Its common to find targets being set and being sacked for not reaching the targets.

On top of that the centers are often rows of tables with pc's. Lighting is mainly if not all artificial.

To progress in such an environment is done often by simply being in the firm a while and 'being a creep'. As such the managers tend not to be too bright, but will be the sort of person who will be happy to tell tales on someone just to get a promotion.

So its not surprising that a lot of people only stay a short time, and those that do stay have little or no ambition.

If you ask any call center manager, they will tell you that things are different at their call center. By this they mean every so often they will have a daft day where everybody dresses up, or some other guff that only the simple minded would find interesting. Often people just go along with it in fear they will look bad in front of their manager.

On top of this its not uncommon for staff to work shifts. Such as working odd weekends, or some late times and other earlys. So anyone who has a family is stuffed.

In all I have wondered if there is anything worse than working at a call center. I have never been able to think of anything. In truth I would prefer to do 5 years in prison rather than 5 years in a call center.

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This leads me on to call centers moving to India.

As I have said call centers are about money. And I think I have made it clear that people do not matter.

So if a firm is told that they can save a ton of cash by moving to India, then those firms get excited.

As such we are now seeing call centers moving to India. But its like a domino affect. No firm wants to be the first as it will look bad on them. After one firm does it, then the others just say they had no choice and must compete.

For most firms moving to India makes sense. Of course they will always tell the staff in the uk branch that they have no plans to move. But if they were not interested in saving cash, why did they have a call center in the first place?

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So what is wrong with Indian call centers?

In truth, the Indian call centers are often very good. The good ones employ very educated staff. Many even having a degree.

As staff in India work UK hours (such as 9 to 5) it means they have the day to themselves (as 9am UK time is not the same as 9am in India if you get my meaning). As such staff are usually more cheerful.

That said some have employed people who do struggle to speak English. As such this creates frustration for the customer.

I have had a few phone calls with someone trying to sell me things, clearly reading from a script with not knowing what the words meant. Once some poor girl asked if I wanted to buy a phone. The offer was good so I asked her a question. She did not understand , and her manager took over. He too could not speak English very well. In the end I hung up. It was bizarre.

But this seems rare. Most times the Indian call centers are good. I am never clear if I am speaking to someone in the UK or India. I feel its too rude to ask.

People who speak to staff in Indian call centers, and are insulting, I have no time for. I see no reason why you should insult someone who is in India. People who do this a racists.

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My problem is not with the Indian call centers, but with UK firms.

You see they have for years treat workers like junk in UK call centers. Some have worked for years doing a job they hate just to get promoted. These firms know this. The directors who are on huge salaries, have a great life, while they exploited the poor sods who do this inhuman job.

I am mad that they can just lay people off, without a care.

Written: Friday, 22. July 2005

-bleep-

This is my view on -bleep-.

First what is -bleep-? In truth '-bleep-' is one of those words that when you look at it could mean anything. Its often down to a persons own believes, for example you may think page 3 is -bleep-, or an advert for sun tan with a model in a bikini being -bleep-. I have heard lots of definitions. After all -bleep- does not have to be of people nude, as you may think photographs of people in fetish gear as -bleep-.

For me the word -bleep- is pointless as it means nothing, and is often used far too freely.

Its a bit like the word career. It means nothing at all. Its just used by the middle classes . The working classes will say they have a job, while the middle classes say they have a career (I say this as it makes me giggle when I hear people say it).

So what do I think of -bleep-?

Ok, lets say in this case -bleep- is describing photographs and films of women topless to acts of sex.

Often when I tell people I do -bleep-, I get asked "are you not ashamed?"

At this I ask, of what?

This is the point people look at me and think. You see we get told -bleep- is wrong all the time, but we never get told why!

So why is -bleep- wrong?

Well let me answer some questions.

All models are aged 18 or older and have signed a model release form. They will also provide two forms of I’d. In the U.S.A. this is the law. No one would be daft enough to risk using models under 18.

The models are not on drugs and I do not give them drugs or alcohol. Maybe this happened in the dodgy 70's, but these days I do not think any decent company would.

What is often suggested is that -bleep- degrades women. Its a valid point, but more I have looked into this, the least I find this to be the truth.

First who says its degrading? Often its the feminist/women lib groups. One has to examine these groups. These groups are made up of mainly middle class women. Why is this significant? Well you have to remember that a large percentage of those women in -bleep- are working class, who can earn as much if not more than most middle class women in middle class jobs. You see, I question the so called feminists motives. I wonder if these girls were only earning a small amount, would the feminists object, or is it purely snobbery?

Do men think less of women because some do -bleep-? Well if this is the case, all men would be considered sex objects by all the women who go see make stripers (shock women go to see male strippers).

Do women suffer doing -bleep-? Well so far, I have only met happy women. I think its best to give you an example of a model I know. She has a daughter of around 5 years of age. She models while her child is at school. She has bought a large house and a porch from modeling. She has nice holidays and spends her time with her doughtier.

Of course she could work long hours in a call centre on low wage, hating her job. Working deadfall hours. Having to creep up to her boss to get on in the firm. Not seeing her doughtier as much. This is the alternative to her doing -bleep-. Now to me this is far more degrading.

Women like sex. This is something people do not like to admit. Many of the girls I shoot enjoy sex. One of my female friends loves to have sex with 5 or so men at a time. This is why I suspect some men hate -bleep-, as it allows women to explore and enjoy sex.

Women do enjoy -bleep-, but probably not as much as men. BUT I suspect women enjoy sex more than men. By this I mean men will use -bleep- while women will seek sex.

I also find that some men will say that women who do -bleep- are tarts. Oddly enough these guys are usually single and virgins at the age of 30 and have grown to detest women out of spite.

One argument I have heard is that the girls are 'disturbed'. By this they mean the girls have been molested or are mentally ill. I have to say that all the models I have met are mentally fine.

Of course people still refer to the bad days of the 70's when things were dodgy and when things were done badly. Bad repetitions from then have carried on to today. Yes things were done badly in the past, but these days things are far different. Lets face it some firms will treat models far better than some big firms will treat there staff.

One problem has been that when TV shows cover -bleep-, they will often interview some moron who is involved in -bleep-. Often making them easily to look stupid. Often the TV show aims are to get cheap digs, yet knowing it will get a big ordinance.

So is -bleep- wrong? In truth I have not ever been told one convincing argument. Yes I have heard the usual drivel such as -bleep- leads to rape and the other daft things extremists come out with.

Is -bleep- harmful?

I have been told that what I do has improved the lives of women, as they have realised that women are all built differently. And the way one woman -bleep- />
Oddly though I do think that page 3 is harmful. The reason I say this, is that page 3 is in so called family newspapers. It shows each day the newspapers idea of beauty. Often big boobed models. I have often believed this affects girls looking at these shots into believing that’s how they should look.

I back this up by the evidence of so many girls wanting boob jobs. When I say girls, I do mean girls. Its not uncommon for 14 years olds wanting breast implants.

You see -bleep- is there if you seek it out, while page 3 is thrust at you. Ok some papers are just -bleep- (such as the Sport) but these are not sold as family papers.

So am I scum?

Well yes I am. But then again I do not drink, and I am a vegetarian. I also take in stray animals, will stop if I see someone breakdown or needs help. I have even gone out with a black bag picking up rubbish.

So why do I say I am scum? Simple, because if I am scum, I often wonder what the so called decent people are, who are happy to shout abuse at me and the models, even spray abuse on my car.

And before you email me and say this is full of grammar mistakes, I am dyslexic, and truth be told, I have got far too much to do than be bothered with irrelevant stuff such as correct grammar.